before i ever had words for Blackness,
i lived inside it.
i knew it in the people who raised me.
in the hands that braided my hair.
in the voices that called my name.
in the humming that filled our home.
in the music that turned ordinary afternoons into dancing.
in the stories shared around tables long before i understood every word.
in the laughter that carried through the house.
in the prayers whispered over children.
in the quiet understanding that some moments were not meant to be interrupted.
long before i understood history,
i understood belonging.
i understood that home could be carried.
i understood that love could be practiced.
i understood that memory could live in ordinary moments.
that is where my understanding of Black begins.
when i chose the name black self wellth, i was trying to honor what i had been carrying all along.
not simply a people.
but a way of belonging.
a way of remembering.
a way of carrying one another.
over the years, my love for the word Black has continued to deepen.
when i look at creation, i notice that many beginnings are hidden before they are revealed.
a child is held in the darkness of the womb before entering the world.
a seed rests beneath the soil before reaching toward the light.
night gives way to dawn.
the unseen often comes before the seen.
these contemplations have become one more reason i honor the word Black.
not because Blackness is only a symbol.
but because creation continues to remind me that beginnings are often held before they are revealed.
to me, Blackness is one of the ways i remember where i come from.
one of the ways i remember who i belong to.
one of the ways i remember that i was created with intention.
and one of the ways i remember that what is sacred is not always loud.
sometimes it is carried in a song.
sometimes in a story.
sometimes in a prayer whispered over a child.
sometimes in the quiet joy of women dancing while they care for a home.
sometimes in the simple ways we carry one another through ordinary days.
that is the Blackness i carry.
that is the Blackness i honor.
and that is one of the ways i remember home.
peace be with you.
—
chriseithia
founder, black self wellth™